ESV translation and word order

The church where I currently serve as pastor uses the ESV translation of the Bible. This translation has many merits, but over the time I have been at the church again and again I have noticed how "clunky" it is.

The ESV translation of the Bible is not a new translation of the Bible, but rather a revision of an existing translation, namely the RSV. The existing word order of the RSV appears to have been retained, meaning that when you read it, the translation sounds rather stilted.

Here is an example (Mark 5:35):

Original RSV: "While he was still speaking, there came from the ruler’s house some who said..."

Current ESV: "While he was still speaking, there came from the ruler's house some who said..." (in this case the ESV has used the RSV version unchanged)

ESV rearranged based on word order in 2025 English: "While he was still speaking, some people came from the ruler's house who said..."

In 2025 English, it is unnatural to order the sentence beginning with the phrase "there came", and it is unusual to say "some" rather than "some people".

The reason for this feature of the translation is that it is a revision of an older translation, not a fresh translation. A strategy for dealing with this would simply be to reorder the words when reading or preaching.

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